We will be capping the race at 5,000 Santas.

(nephew. wearing a Turuhl...nick, holding a tiger.)

I am sorry but when I get an email that says, "We will be capping the race at 5,000 Santas."  

I am paying attention. and then showing people how cool I am. 

because this is my important inbox.

I am also loving the fact that spellcheck is telling me SANTA cannot be plural. 

That is sort of amazing. and spellcheck is right. 

But this weekend I am running in a race where the entry packet includes a beard and hat. so need I say more about why I am running this race? They had me at.... "please wear your beard."

In other important news:

There are miniature ice skaters in my den that tell me Christmas is coming. 

True statement.

There is also a small house in my den that plays a Christmas song on repeat. and no one has complained once or turned it down. and as you will see in a later post. it has been here at a clutch time. so I appreciate its flashing lights and constant tune.

In the spirit of giving. and shopping. and smiling at things.

*

*

I added a few more of my illustrations to my website store.

Like this one.

and I now offer my illustration prints in 3 sizes.

(not all prints available in these sizes. just the illustration ones. you'll see on my site.)

25.00 for 10" x 10" prints. 

50.00 for 15" x 15" prints.

80.00 for 20" x 20" prints.

so peek around at --> web.me.com/abernathybland <---my website.

and contact abernathy.parade@gmail.com

to see if the one you want is available!

Happy Christmas.

The grocery store tried to pick a fight with me. but I won.

Sometimes I inappropriately think my life is more complicated than it is. or busier. or harder.
Then I get a grip.
It's just different. So. Sometimes that confuses me.
_____________________

let me explain:

It's Happening...




I am currently listening to the Orange Hanson CD. 

this means I have hit the point where I need it.

Some of you are freaking out because you have this music...

You even have Hanson Christmas. Which. 

By the way. is 

AWESOME.

click above for a treat from 1998.

( I have spent more time in my life trying to tell people that Hanson is not just MMM Bop. although I can still jam out to that. easily.
 In all seriousness, they are on my list of good music. believe it or not. Sermon over.) 

I am also wearing my glasses that help me focus. 

So things are looking ummm...shady.

Because severe deadlines have hit. 

and reality. 

as it does. 

showed its ugly face...



in the cereal aisle.

_______________

I had to get the dollar cereal.

But look. here is a good point- They have dollar cereal.
I mean. hi. yay.
There are only 4 choices. But one is the dollar version of Smacks.
And it has been 241 years since I had those last. So I am due.

Disclaimer- I have a hard time talking about the realities of my artistic leap. But I also feel like it is silly not to... because. it is part of it all.




It's just that I both laugh and cry inside when I am in stores these days. Grocery stores are hard because. well...

If it helps. I will make a chart.






(look at my chart title. see. I am full of details.)

_________________________

Here's the thing

I hit lows.

and then I call my friend who is an illustration-loving-trolley-riding treasure. and 

WE CRACK UP OVER OUR POSITION IN LIFE. 

WE LAUGH SO HARD on the phone in the grocery store.

and all of a sudden it is more funny than scary.

while we are both at the store at one moment shopping on opposite coasts for the cheapest apples.

FYI

Value = Bananas.

WHY ARE THEY SO CHEAP???!! 

 sh please tell no one. 

I think no one has noticed that their price is still from 1932. so yeah. this info is between you and me.

and if they are a buck tomorrow I am gonna know who spilled. And I am going to steal your 

$2.50 pomegranate.

.
__________________________

The other amazing thing I do to move forward
 is bombard artists that I love.

This started when I was young.
As mentioned above. I starting loving Hanson in middle school. I think I wrote Taylor Hanson 3 letters fully expecting he would contact me.
I mean. 

I worked on those letters. and edited them.


(HALT. WAIT. it started younger. I WROTE A FAN LETTER TO LISA FRANK in elementary school.)

YES. I SAID LISA FRANK.

dont even tell me you didn't appreciate the rainbow colored unicorns and dancing animals and sunglasses and well..click the link above and unicorn-techno-dreams is in the bottom right of the folder selection.

She was a staple from school supply shopping days of yesterday.


SHE NEVER REPLIED.

BUT. 

The grown up me ( I use that term subjectively) still contacts artists.

I feel an urge to tell people they are doing things right.

And I HAVE NEVER BEEN LET DOWN when I contact cool people. 

They say amazing things. 

I contacted this letterpress printer. I have mentioned him before - Amos Kennedy. And I told him-
Thank you for your documentary about leaving the corporate world and following your dream.

he wrote me back and I read his email one night when I was feeling the strain of 2 full time jobs.

He is fantastic.

He says- Proceed and Be Bold.

and in his email back to me he said
Enjoy your adventure.

(I have some of his prints. I want all of them) 

_____________________

And my friend Kelle... I reached out to her after I saw her blog for the first time.

You should read the birth story of her second daughter. it is beautiful.

*

*

*

 I said
Hi. You are hilarious, smart, crazy, and take striking pictures. but mostly I love your honesty. and the raw stories you tell.

And pretty immediately we decided we were born in the same hospital. and we hung out in neighboring little baby beds in the nursery. high-fived. said our goodbyes. were separated and found each other again via the internet.

Weird? 

YES.

BUT that is why we are cool.

_______

And friendships between artists and thinkers and DOERS are my favorite. 

I need to start shouting out to my people more often. because they keep me going. 

Because when you are looking for how to stretch a dollar. eventually that dollar breaks. 

And you need people. 

and

I am going to keep going, because I have a good feeling about things. 

______________________

See. This 12 year old wandered into my studio. smiled. and sincerely asked,
 "Why did you make all this stuff?"

I was silent for a second thinking of the answer when she threw her arms up and shrieked,
"OhhhhHHHHHH! IT JUST COMES OUTTA YOUR SOUUUULLL!!!!!"

I nodded and said,
"wow.yes. Exactly."

Then she looked around.

Smiled.

And hugged me big.

_______________________

And bam. I was full again.

_______________________

Brothers are important.

Happy Birthday brother. 

Ickie. Happy birthday to you sweet brother. thank you for taking the time to look at all the art I brought home from college one Christmas. when people were downstairs eating asparagus casserole you studied everything I brought home upstairs. and called me up to look at it with you. thank you for being supportive. for writing parts for my puppets. for asking my opinion. for showing me scripts. for challenging my brain. it is a dream job to collaborate on new theater. 

I remember all the kind things you do. like getting me iced coffee. painting straight lines across an entire stage and sleeping on the theater floor while im working through the night. So today- put tartar sauce on pancakes. and live big today. well. every day. but today wear a candle hat or something so everyone knows doris. wonder mom. delivered you today. wait. we should celebrate doris too actually. yall should ride a jackalope to atlantic city. thats exactly what i hope you are doing while I type this. 

___________________________________________

.end message.

___________________________________________

Back off rabbit.

_________________________

Well, this is an inappropriately late start to November.

I promise it won't happen again.

___________


But I put an inordinate amount of time into Halloween.
and so does the street I live on.

 My love for design.theater.and sculpture is to blame.
around the holidays...I have no control.


___________

I live in a

TimBurtonHauntedAppleOrchardYellowOrangeLeafPilePumpkinCoveredFallVegas Wonderland.

_______________________________


I think the above picture could be an entire post. Sit and stare at it with a coffee in the AM and

Life. Is. Good.

__________________________________
I just scrolled up and looked at it again. and my heart exploded. Those colors are for real.


There is a city tradition
 that a few blocks of one street downtown go ALL OUT for Halloween.


This street attracts a billion kids from all over the city.


I almost think that a billion is a fairly accurate educated guess.

Do not let this little guy fool you. 

He is the cute before the storm.

And. Storm

literally. too.

in an ideal world. I would carry around awards at all times. ones that meant something big. 

and this family would get one. 

And

This sweetie wanted to hold my sister's parasol. She handed it over immediately. of course.

It is very appropriate that I landed in the pile of leaves that is - This Street.


I mean, the day after Halloween. I was exhausted.
I think I still am.



And



I walked outside to this.

That. Looks. Terrible.



________________________________________

But is so hilariously on point.


And don't underestimate the exercise of clutching a bowl of candy for 3 hours. in the freezing rain.

plus thousands of candy dropping reps.

No lie. My arms were destroyed.

_________________________________________


I walked to get some coffee in the morning. over a confetti covered ground.

________________________________________


Right?

These neighborhood people are on. my. page.

Speaking of my page...






This year for Halloween 2011.
 the Circus Came to Town. 


Ladies and Gentlemen, Dream Come True.

The Ringmaster.

Costume Preface: Homemade.

And in my current starving artist state I spent $8.00 total.
umm. that was just for the gold fringe I felt I NEEDED. it seemed really important at the time.



Everything else was already mine. and was edited with my sewing machine.
built out of cardboard.
or covered in glitter.
per usual.



Man it helps that my wardrobe could occasionally be confused for a costume trunk.
Would not be happy any other way. 


Started with my dad's old gray vest.
but
I altered it and. of course. circus-ed it up.



<--- psssst there is the $8.00 fringe.

And here is a teeny cardboard top hat I built.

That held up against 392031831 hits. and a downpour.

I kept forgetting I was wearing it. and was only reminded when it would smash into something.

 And we suited up two nights. so. 

it was pretty indestructible. twice.

Step 2- should always read- Add Glitter.


__________________________________



And I have people that will go the same distance. when it is important to do so.



CIRCUS FREAKS. 


______________



The Clown.





_________________________



The Tight Rope Walker.

The Circus Prep

Started with a spill.

___________________

And I present- the beauty of a neighborhood that goes to the max.

stop the madness. this cracks me up.

this castle went up in a day. and back down the next.
poof.

I never get tired of this idea. I just don't.

 someone talk to the ghost who leaned in the shot.

well.

 I think the general rule of thumb is... 
when in costume, go to a diner.

 KE$HA likes pancakes too.

again. if I had awards. brilliant people like this lady. would probably get more than one.

And. I see everything right with this picture.

 But seriously. Halloween sets me back a minute. Because I can't go half way.

So. I will climb out of this real life drawing and get back to work.

This counts as work though, right?

________________________________________________